Bellfabquam Waprutmon is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, resourceful jackal.

Bellfabquam Waprutmon created humankind two million years ago.

If you believe in Bellfabquam Waprutmon, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bellfabquam Waprutmon, he will turn you into a slug.

Bellfabquam Waprutmon's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Bellfabquam Waprutmon's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention foxes.

2. Never wear tights.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near moths while wearing orange trousers and balancing nine silver spheres on your back.