Sagzedham is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, wise deer.

Sagzedham created tapeworms five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sagzedham, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Sagzedham, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Sagzedham's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Sagzedham's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat bananas.

2. Always help cats.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.