Nuttfaslip is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, unthoughtful gerbil.

Nuttfaslip created the Cigar Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Nuttfaslip, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nuttfaslip, it will send you a sign.

Nuttfaslip's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Nuttfaslip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not hurt goats.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nuttfaslip.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force.