Baffunnarl is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, egotistical hamster.

Baffunnarl created life eight million years ago.

If you believe in Baffunnarl, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Baffunnarl, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Baffunnarl's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Baffunnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Baffunnarl.

2. Never talk about tapirs.

3. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.

4. Do not wear purple clothing.

5. Never write about quantum field theory.