Ciddunquag is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, prudent frog.

Ciddunquag created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ciddunquag, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Ciddunquag, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Ciddunquag's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Ciddunquag's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never paint your back yellow.

3. Ciddunquag loves sharks, so they must be respected.

4. Erect four lead sculptures of Ciddunquag on top of important buildings.

5. Do not eat cucumbers.