Latrawfid is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, sapient bird.

Latrawfid created tapeworms four billion years ago.

If you believe in Latrawfid, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Latrawfid, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Latrawfid's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Latrawfid's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics.

3. Never sprint in holy places.

4. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.