Cubkapdad is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, competent jaguar.

Cubkapdad created humanity three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cubkapdad, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cubkapdad, he will come to you in dreams.

Cubkapdad's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Cubkapdad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair white.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Always treat snails with great respect.

4. Never write about galaxies.

5. Do not bounce in public.