Ligrighas is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, intelligent elephant.

Ligrighas created oxygen four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ligrighas, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ligrighas, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Ligrighas' most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Ligrighas' Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Ligrighas.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Hide if four doves approach from the north.

5. Never play with disobedient children.