Ontvegarp is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, slow wombat.

Ontvegarp created an electron two years ago.

If you believe in Ontvegarp, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ontvegarp, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Ontvegarp's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Ontvegarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck orange.

2. Never think ill of sick cats.

3. Do not wear brown clothing.

4. You must pray to Ontvegarp six times a day.

5. Never write about bacteria.