Tensislog is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, omniscient jaguar.

Tensislog created Europe nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tensislog, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Tensislog, he will remove you from existence.

Tensislog's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Tensislog's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured snails.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Always treat nematodes with great respect.

5. Never think about enzymes.