Davzaging is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, emotional dove.

Davzaging created snails six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Davzaging, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Davzaging, it will cry a lot.

Davzaging's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Davzaging's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about black holes.

2. Run away if four dogs approach from the north.

3. Do not wear orange clothing.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never laugh in the presence of goats.