Xucnurlstip is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, egotistical penguin.

Xucnurlstip created a charm quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xucnurlstip, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Xucnurlstip, it will destroy your home solar system.

Xucnurlstip's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Xucnurlstip's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a building before entering it.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Never wear ear rings.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Hide from fawn hamsters for they are unholy.