Metomin is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, astonishing wolf.

Metomin created energy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Metomin, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Metomin, she will be very unhappy.

Metomin's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Metomin's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

4. Never think about eukaryotes.

5. Never look in ponds.