Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, tranquil horse.

Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot created carbon six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot, she will turn you into a mole.

Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot.

3. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot on top of important buildings.

4. Always wear pink.

5. Worship no other gods but Dudhamtig Kimjanjam Bopyimbunbot.