Vantarpont is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, smart seal.

Vantarpont created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Vantarpont, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vantarpont, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Vantarpont's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Vantarpont's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Vantarpont on top of all buildings.

4. Never eat limes.

5. Do not eat cucumbers.