Kennabaf is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unfair whale.

Kennabaf created Europe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kennabaf, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Kennabaf, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Kennabaf's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Kennabaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nucleic acids.

2. Do not speak about turnips.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Worship no other gods but Kennabaf.

5. Never eat pineapples.