Mapomincin is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, happy snake.

Mapomincin created a bottom quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mapomincin, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Mapomincin, she will turn you into a mouse.

Mapomincin's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Mapomincin's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Never hurt horses.

4. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

5. Never write about quantum gravity.