Jabsidyarwanwipvolponmob Fagdibtonk is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, weak shark.

Jabsidyarwanwipvolponmob Fagdibtonk created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jabsidyarwanwipvolponmob Fagdibtonk, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Jabsidyarwanwipvolponmob Fagdibtonk, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Jabsidyarwanwipvolponmob Fagdibtonk's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Jabsidyarwanwipvolponmob Fagdibtonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Retreat if four eagles approach from the east.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never run in holy places.

5. Never hurt cats.