Padappsadfubduncub is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, sage hippopotamus.

Padappsadfubduncub created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Padappsadfubduncub, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Padappsadfubduncub, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Padappsadfubduncub's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Padappsadfubduncub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. You must love Padappsadfubduncub.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Do not cook food in pots.