Dannuttbidarm is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, confident gorilla.

Dannuttbidarm created carbon three billion years ago.

If you believe in Dannuttbidarm, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dannuttbidarm, he will cry a lot.

Dannuttbidarm's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Dannuttbidarm's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never skip near sheep.

3. Do not dye your hair cyan.

4. Erect three nickel sculptures of Dannuttbidarm on top of important buildings.

5. Do not stand on grass.