Wigshavid Tigzentig is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, all-knowing pig.

Wigshavid Tigzentig created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Wigshavid Tigzentig, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wigshavid Tigzentig, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Wigshavid Tigzentig's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Wigshavid Tigzentig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about dark energy.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.