Cid is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, unjust spider.

Cid created viruses nine million years ago.

If you believe in Cid, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Cid, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Cid's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Cid's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from red turtles for they are unholy.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Cid in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not hop in public.