Dussbassjam is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, temperamental naga.

Dussbassjam created the universe five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dussbassjam, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Dussbassjam, he will send minions to preach to you.

Dussbassjam's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Dussbassjam's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three nickel sculptures of Dussbassjam on top of important buildings.

2. Always help turtles.

3. Always help sick moths.

4. Never think about comets.

5. Never paint your chest pink.