Nuttbapbell is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, stupid porpoise.

Nuttbapbell created humanity two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuttbapbell, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nuttbapbell, he will send you a sign.

Nuttbapbell's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Nuttbapbell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt grasshopers.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.