Quartsugdab is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, unjust slug.

Quartsugdab created the Virgo Supercluster three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quartsugdab, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Quartsugdab, he will curse you with boils.

Quartsugdab's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Quartsugdab's Holy Commandments

1. Put Quartsugdab first in all things.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never feed cherries to doves while wearing purple kilts.

5. Quartsugdab loves ducks, so they must be honoured.