Quamranfoss is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, emotional salamander.

Quamranfoss created viruses three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quamranfoss, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Quamranfoss, she will strike you with lightening.

Quamranfoss' most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Quamranfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate nematodes.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.