Cinflatbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, ruthless chicken.

Cinflatbaf created a quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Cinflatbaf, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cinflatbaf, it will send you a sign.

Cinflatbaf's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Cinflatbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near ducks while wearing mauve shoes and balancing five silver spheres on your feet.

4. Do not eat tomatoes.

5. Retreat if four manatees approach from the west.