Fatfedfab is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, cheerful chicken.

Fatfedfab created the planet Saturn nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fatfedfab, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fatfedfab, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Fatfedfab's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Fatfedfab's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.

3. Worship no other gods but Fatfedfab.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Never talk about special relativity near tortoises while wearing blue coats.