Zancemingquat is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, witty grasshopper.

Zancemingquat created an electron two years ago.

If you believe in Zancemingquat, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Zancemingquat, she will strike you with lightening.

Zancemingquat's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Zancemingquat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep nine goats in a large pit.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Erect four carbon sculptures of Zancemingquat on top of important buildings.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.