Toncipbif is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, amazing chinchilla.

Toncipbif created the Tadpole Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Toncipbif, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Toncipbif, she will turn you into a rock.

Toncipbif's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Toncipbif's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never talk about optics.

4. Always obey Toncipbif's priests.

5. Never feed lots of parsnips to whales while wearing indigo scarves.