Pitminxenbotquimspag is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unfair mongoose.

Pitminxenbotquimspag created humanity three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitminxenbotquimspag, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Pitminxenbotquimspag, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Pitminxenbotquimspag's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Pitminxenbotquimspag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Never eat limes.

4. Always treat grasshopers with great respect.

5. Pitminxenbotquimspag loves monkeys, so they must be honoured.