Veenpangfon is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, merciful chicken.

Veenpangfon created parasitic wasps four billion years ago.

If you believe in Veenpangfon, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Veenpangfon, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Veenpangfon's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Veenpangfon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep nine sharks in a large pit.

2. Feed all hungry squirrels.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not covet oxen.