Dapcemmat is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unsympathetic goat.

Dapcemmat created a quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dapcemmat, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dapcemmat, he will turn you into a goat.

Dapcemmat's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Dapcemmat's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

5. Do not stand on grass.