Cussleghen Yarpflapfot is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, bad-tempered goose.

Cussleghen Yarpflapfot created Mount Everest four years ago.

If you believe in Cussleghen Yarpflapfot, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cussleghen Yarpflapfot, she will turn you into a tree.

Cussleghen Yarpflapfot's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Cussleghen Yarpflapfot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about planets.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Always treat horses with great respect.

4. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Cussleghen Yarpflapfot in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never think about dark energy near dolphins while wearing indigo corsets and balancing seven titanium spheres on your face.