Cantanort is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, kind pig.

Cantanort created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Cantanort, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cantanort, he will jump up and down on your head.

Cantanort's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Cantanort's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about eukaryotes.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Cantanort.

3. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.