Donfidken is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, temperamental dryad.

Donfidken created Asia eight million years ago.

If you believe in Donfidken, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Donfidken, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Donfidken's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Donfidken's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

2. Hide from orange seals for they are unholy.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Donfidken.

5. Do not wear yellow clothing.