Nakcemwon is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, selfish cobra.

Nakcemwon created an up quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nakcemwon, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nakcemwon, she will remove you from existence.

Nakcemwon's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Nakcemwon's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nakcemwon.

3. Nakcemwon loves gulls, so they must be respected.

4. Do not speak about aubergines.

5. Do not drink alcohol.