Jarndusscen is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, humane goblin.

Jarndusscen created the Black Eye Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jarndusscen, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Jarndusscen, it will turn you into a hamster.

Jarndusscen's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Jarndusscen's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always help rats.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not hop in public.

5. Always wear white.