Venlitjad Vogmitmig is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, deceitful camel.

Venlitjad Vogmitmig created the Sombrero Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Venlitjad Vogmitmig, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Venlitjad Vogmitmig, she will turn you into a goat.

Venlitjad Vogmitmig's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Venlitjad Vogmitmig's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never look at dwarf planets.

3. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

4. Erect a giant red sculpture of Venlitjad Vogmitmig in the centre of the settlement.

5. Respect your elders.