Gednurquim is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, moody dingo.

Gednurquim created time and space eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gednurquim, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gednurquim, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gednurquim's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Gednurquim's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Put Gednurquim first in all things.

4. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

5. Always take life seriously.