Bapnullnilltailfed is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, almighty centaur.

Bapnullnilltailfed created carbon five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapnullnilltailfed, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bapnullnilltailfed, he will turn you into a rock.

Bapnullnilltailfed's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Bapnullnilltailfed's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Bapnullnilltailfed five times a day.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bapnullnilltailfed.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near goats while wearing black scarves and balancing six nickel spheres on your hands.