Nanparklog is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, duplicitous hydra.

Nanparklog created a top quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nanparklog, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nanparklog, he will be very unhappy.

Nanparklog's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Nanparklog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

2. Never talk about gravity near swans while wearing orange rings and balancing six gold spheres on your feet.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Never bounce near goats.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.