Ingtitmet is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, conceited centipede.

Ingtitmet created humanity three million years ago.

If you believe in Ingtitmet, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Ingtitmet, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Ingtitmet's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Ingtitmet's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. You must love Ingtitmet.

4. Hide from indigo sheep for they are unholy.

5. Never sit in the presence of ducks.