Yamdidkem is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, resourceful jellyfish.

Yamdidkem created an atom seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yamdidkem, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Yamdidkem, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Yamdidkem's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Yamdidkem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never talk about quantum gravity near seals while wearing violet boots.

3. You must love Yamdidkem.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never look in ponds.