Milsitloopfub is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, all-knowing centipede.

Milsitloopfub created carbon five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Milsitloopfub, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Milsitloopfub, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Milsitloopfub's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Milsitloopfub's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never feed lots of wheat to foxes while wearing fawn tights.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

4. Never write about nucleic acids.

5. Milsitloopfub must be the most important thing in your life.