Vonkdubbot is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, annoying chicken.

Vonkdubbot created humanity seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkdubbot, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Vonkdubbot, she will be very sad.

Vonkdubbot's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Vonkdubbot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near monkeys while wearing magenta shoes and balancing three carbon spheres on your hands.

2. Never mention manatees.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.