Gedxemtamshav is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, astonishing coyote.

Gedxemtamshav created the planet Venus six billion years ago.

If you believe in Gedxemtamshav, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gedxemtamshav, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gedxemtamshav's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Gedxemtamshav's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight monkeys approach from the east.

2. Erect four zinc sculptures of Gedxemtamshav on top of important buildings.

3. Never go into cyan rooms.

4. Gedxemtamshav loves bats, so they must be respected.

5. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Gedxemtamshav in the centre of the settlement.