Cipnurtmip is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, strong chinchilla.

Cipnurtmip created the universe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Cipnurtmip, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Cipnurtmip, he will refuse to believe in you.

Cipnurtmip's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Cipnurtmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

3. Never think about dark energy near capybaras while wearing cyan jumpers and balancing nine iron spheres on your arms.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.