Legflamlegwad is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, stupid bat.

Legflamlegwad created tapeworms two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Legflamlegwad, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Legflamlegwad, he will refuse to believe in you.

Legflamlegwad's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Legflamlegwad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in black rooms.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Legflamlegwad must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Hide from orange dolphins for they are unholy.

5. Legflamlegwad loves capybaras, so they must be respected.