Nabtikdag is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, almighty newt.

Nabtikdag created the planet Earth seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nabtikdag, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nabtikdag, he will throw large rocks at you.

Nabtikdag's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Nabtikdag's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Always look after injured cats.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always make sure there are no aardvarks in a building before entering it.